Lately Jordan has been falling asleep on the couch a lot. One night he was snoring so badly that I was concerned he wasn't actually getting enough air. To help him breathe a little easier, and to perform experiments on the best way to keep him from snoring in the future I began to rotate his head from left to right, hoping to find the key position that would help him breath/stop the onslaught of snores.
Left to right didn't help so I tried moving his head up and down, and started to see more preferred results. Tilting his head back was working fabulously, but I couldn't quite get it back far enough to achieve maximum breathing capability, so I was ever so gently tugging the pillow out from under his head when he woke up. And saw me standing over him. And brought his hands up to his throat and screamed like a
The next night he fell asleep I was a little more careful. It was getting late, and I wanted to wake him so he could go to bed. But I didn't want to wake and scare him again, and I didn't want to leave him to sleep on the couch, and I'm sure if I just left him there he'd wake up in the middle of the night and ask me why I never woke him.
So I sat there, for an hour, while I pondered on what to do. I was in a lose-lose situation. Finally I decided it had to be done, this man had to wake up here and now and go to bed simply so I could go to bed. Without hovering over him, I gently shook him and quietly said his name. Nothing. A little harder, a little louder, and he woke up. And screamed: "Don't, don't!" Treating him like an injured and frightened animal I put my hands in the hair and said as calmly as I could "Come on Jordan, it's time to go to bed."
"Don't, DON'T!"
I'm not sure what sleepy dream-state Jordan thought I was going to do to him, but apparently my presence was no good so I deemed him awake enough to find his way to the bed and left him there.
The third night he fell asleep on the couch, I was going to approach this in a no-nonsense manner. I woke him, told him it was time for bed, received my "Don't, don't" and left him there to sort out his confusion, come back to reality and make it to bed.
Next time, I think I'll just let him sleep on the couch and enjoy the extra room in the bed.
2 comments:
You could always buy some Halloween masks and really scare him- It would be good for a laugh!
LOL! Sam has also snores, so loudly at times I wanna punch him. I lay there exhausted wonder how he isn't waking himself up. When he falls asleep and I have to wake him he sometimes acts like it is the first time he has ever been startled in his life. :) Husbands are always good for a laugh. I wonder what they'd say about us...if they blogged.
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